They say you have to be the change you want to see in the world. I fully agree with this concept, and most times, I try to model it for the kids. I have always said “please” and “thank you” to people, including them, because I expect them to do it as well. I tip well, I smile, I hold the door for others, all things of basic manners that I fully expect my teenagers to exhibit. It makes them “odd” to startled adults who don’t expect it, but it also makes them good people.
But there is definitely one lesson in which I fail miiiisssseeerrrably to be the good example. And that, my friends, is in sun protection. I know that pale skin is healthy skin, and that any bit of tan is damaging. I’ve heard it all before. And perhaps this is contradictory to my nature, but I am absolutely, 100% against the fake-n-bake tan. the sun’s rays, while damaging, are also natural enough to have some benefit to them. The vitamin D is essential, and for people with S.A.D., it can be a life saver. (And yes, for those people, the use of light boxes is, of course, warranted.) But in general, I am very against tanning beds.
That said, when I hit the beach, I apply sunblock enough so that I do not burn, and then I settle in and let the sunlight seep into my body. The heat infuses my joints with gentle waves, and makes my skin a nice golden brown. Now, I have burned; don’t get me wrong. And when I do? I am the first person to label myself with the moniker of “Dumbass.” But honestly, if I do burn, it’s generally that I swiped the sunblock over my skin and missed a spot, or reapplied, but not in time. It’s rare that I burn badly or all over. (Although, in the case of my burn from Isla Saona this April, it was faulty sunblock because we both slathered repeatedly and both got roasted!) I do admit to finding tan lines kinda sexy, and for me personally, I especially love the ones on my feet. Those flip-flop lines tend to stay there through the winter, reminding me that flip-flop weather has promised to return to me.
When the kids were little, I slathered them from head to toe in spf50, dressed them in spf50 rash guard shirts, plopped hats on their little heads, and hoped for the best. I didn’t keep them inside in bubble wrap, but I definitely practiced due diligence in protecting their skin. Sunburn when they were little? Not on my watch. As they got older, they slacked a few times, and The Artist especially, got fried. Poor girl, she can walk to the mailbox for the morning post and get sunburned, while her brother can go without sunblock for a day at the pool and barely have a tinge of pink on his shoulders. He is my Coppertone baby for sure. The Professor is in the middle. She tans, but she also goes over the line pretty easily.
Now that they’re older, they have started to make their own health decisions, and in turn, deal with the ramifications of those decisions. The Ambassador, for example, actively “works” on his summer tan to attract more girls. (Can you see my eyes rolling at this one?) He has blond hair and blue eyes, so the golden tan just makes him look like a California surfer dude.
La Professora is pretty good about sunblock, especially with her masto going crazy lately. Sunlight and masto don’t get along very well, so she’ll get splotchy if she gets too much. But this past weekend, she used the spf 15 and got a light tan, while keeping the dreaded pink skin at bay.
We definitely keep high spf around for the Artist, but even she decided to try her hand at tanning and “only” used spf 15 this weekend. She did pretty well; no burn at all. Of course, her desire for a lack of tan lines on her back makes the guys who go by trip over themselves, but we’re trying to adjust to that one, too. (More eyerolling from Mom inserted here.)
I know I should make sure they wear their rashguards and spf 472 any time they walk out the door. I do understand the risks of melanoma, and the fact that any sun exposure is touted in the media as deadly. But really, with all of the other perils they will face in their lives, and the risks that they will take as they navigate their way through college, work, society, dating, I just decided that the occasional times at the beach would be low stress, without Mom bugging them every four seconds to put on more sunblock. So chalk this one up to being a lousy mom, but it looks like my kids just might be sporting a tan for now.
You pick and choose. And, there are studies that show we need about twenty minutes of completely unprotected sun a day (just not in high-intensity) in order to get Vitamin D. You are right in that you instilled the values when they were kids, and now, they have to choose. Ideally, one should slather on the suntan lotion any time one is outdoors. I doubt many people do that, either. You are not a lousy mom, no matter how much you try to pretend you are.
SHHhhh!! Jeez, Minna, quite trying to give away my secrets.
I know most people don’t use sunblock every day and such, but active sunbathing isn’t the healthiest thing, and I do admit to engaging in it as often as I can be at the beach. Just not a great example to set for them. But yeah, they do have to choose at this stage of their lives. This whole idea of making the kids responsible and in control of their lives is hard sometimes!
Well, I’m a lousier mom then you by that standard and I’ve only been a mom for 19 months! I’ve chosen to use very little sunblock overall. I only apply it when we’re going to be out in the sun all day. I’m very conscious about staying indoors/in shade during the 10am – 2pm hours otherwise. There’s been some controversy about sun exposure and it seems that the skin cancers that occur due to over exposure are the easily treatable ones. Then again I’m practically on the 45th parallel so my sun isn’t as strong as yours!
Not even remotely. =) My nearly 19 years doesn’t make me better than your nearly 19 months. Just different!
I used to keep them in a bit more during the peak sun hours, but now? That’s when we hit the beach when we’re there, to bake in a bit more tan! =) But yes, you are quite a bit further north than I am, and my plan is to head further south!
I think that the media hypes the dangers of our world for the sole purpose of sitting back and watching the puppets dance. But moderation is a good thing, no?